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I’d like to offer a few words of advice based on recent experiences. Never, under any circumstances, sign up to receive Google news alerts about Madonna.

As the editor of the Residence section of The Press, it’s my job to make sure that I’m on top of all things real estate here on the East End. It’s not that often that there’s what we call “breaking news” for my section, but it does happen from time to time (such as when Bernie Madoff’s Montauk house was seized, and again when it was sold).

And now rumors are swirling that Madonna is set to purchase a horse farm in Bridgehampton. My dark sense of humor led me immediately to come up with the headline “Pop Icon Buys the Farm,” but that type of thing is really much more appropriate for The New York Post. So anyway, even though it is still not confirmed, this speculative story about Madonna buying Kelly Klein’s land has appeared everywhere, and I do mean everywhere.

As a journalist, I always want to be sure that I have all the facts before I run an article about something as big as this, which is essentially just juicy gossip at this point. So I called several sources, but could not get confirmation that Madonna is in fact buying this Bridgehampton farm. And before I left the office on Friday, I decided to go the extra mile and set up a Google news alert on the off-chance that something would actually come of the rumors.

Big mistake. Aside from Oprah, Barack Obama and Tiger Woods, I cannot imagine another living person who is written about more than Madonna.

Not only is the India Business Blog covering this “non-story,” which has still not been confirmed by any source whatsoever, but apparently the readers of the Times of India even clamor for the most banal news about Madonna. Apparently, they need to know that “Pop diva Madonna has revealed that her adopted son David Banda is fascinated by her outfits and loves wearing them.” Sheesh!

Now, on to some more important things that have actually happened, or will happen soon.

Congratulations to Thomas Calabrese of Speonk. He got engaged earlier this month to his sweetheart, Krystal Saviano. Here’s to many happy years together.

Eastport Bible Church on Montauk Highway will once again host a live nativity scene this Sunday, December 20, from 4 to 6:50 p.m. There will also be a Christmas worship concert at 7 p.m. at the church. The live nativity is also planned for Christmas Eve.

MaryRose Occhino, who some of you might know as the psychic-intuitive host of “Angels on Call” on Sirius/XM Satellite Radio, has a new spiritual gift shop, called Celestial Whispers, on Main Street in Center Moriches. Ms. Occhino will conduct psychic seminars at the store every other Saturday beginning on December 19, from 7 to 9 p.m.

The cost to attend a seminar is $100 per person and reservations and prepayment are required. For more information, visit celestialwhispers.com or e-mail contact@celestialwhispers.com. Additional seminars will be offered on January 9 and 23.

It’s almost that time of the year again where would-be soap boxers need to get all their supplies ready to roll. Pack 1 of the Cub Scouts of America, which consists of boys from Remsenburg, Speonk and the Westhampton area, will hold its annual Pinewood Derby at Westhampton Beach High School on Sunday, January 24. The fun starts at 1 p.m.

Interested in participating or volunteering? Call Lisa Federico at 325-8208.

Speaking of traditions, this weekend is the eighth annual Westhampton Beach Holiday Lighting Contest. Participants must live or own businesses in the village and must have their decorations in place before Friday, December 18. Judging will run from 5 to 10 p.m. that night—so make sure your lights are turned on!

The winners will be announced in a future edition of The Press and prizes will be handed out at the next Westhampton Beach Village Board meeting on January 7. For more information about the contest, call 702-1558.

Happy holidays!