Forgiveness is the key

Do you want to fly? Forgive.

Do you want to realize your relationships? Forgive.

Do you want to rise to your highest potential? Forgive, and you will, for forgiveness, though fundamental and beautiful and profound, is the most lighthearted and liberating exercise you can practice. It frees not only the person you forgive, but it frees you from the bonds of repetition and stasis.

Think for a moment of how it feels to hold a grudge, or hang on to an irritation with someone else’s behavior, or become frustrated because of a situation over which you seem to have no control, or to nurse a hurt inflicted upon you.

Pretty heavy, isn’t it? Extra, unneeded weight dragging you down. Victimization unlimited. No flying allowed.

And yet, we all have the power to rise above the weights, lift our spirits, and thus, instead of remaining stuck in a circular pattern of concentration on the hurt someone has caused us—the injustice we see in someone’s behavior, the destructiveness of a situation—we’re able to step back, look at the situation and our role in it, view the movie in which we’re starring, and decide to forgive.

Each of us has the right to our own dignity: the inherent worthiness of all human beings, our self-esteem, our self concept and our self respect. Forgiveness involves the preservation and restoration of dignity. We’re noble creatures, moving along our own individual paths of spiritual awareness and maturity.

And so, finding forgiveness in a situation and practicing it is recognizing and giving respect not only to the human experience, but to the person who’s undergoing this human experience. And—this is very important—to ourselves, for when we’re forgiving, we’re giving ourselves a wonderful gift. We’re tapping into grace; we’re coming from our heart, where all good spiritual energy resides.

As Gurumayi Chidvilasananda says, “Forgiveness sings the glory of the heart.” And with this divine grace that’s ours for the taking and giving, we’re offering not only a way out of a negative pattern, but a way toward the greater achievement of grace. When we reach into our heart and bring forth forgiveness, we’re also bringing with it the other great virtues that exist in our heart. And so, forgiveness becomes a mutually transforming act.

Now, to begin this important spiritual practice, it’s necessary to accept a fundamental truth I’ve spoken of several times in this column. And that’s the realization that we’re all here, doing the best we can in this lifetime. It’s part of the curriculum of what I call Earth School. But it’s how we handle each situation, each life lesson that matters.

If we feel wronged unjustly, we sometimes resent the situation, and want to make it right. But by doing this, all we get is an extra load to carry around. When we’re tied by our own resentments, we must forgive and let go, for the sake of our own well-being, because holding onto resentments is really only punishing ourselves.

Forgiveness, on the other hand, expands our souls by opening us to the truth that there is no judgment or guilt in the spirit world. We’re simply here having all sorts of personal interactions with people, all kinds of encounters and relationships; all, at one time or another, involving forgiveness.

And the question naturally arises: Why? Why should I work at forgiveness? Why is it such an important virtue?

It’s because it’s one of the greatest exercises we can perform. It allows us to grow, expand and see things in a bigger way. And this makes us a bigger person. Think of the love that exists and rises from the heart. It carries forgiveness at its very core. Both loving and forgiving imply caring, and so forgiveness and love contain each other. And love is not a choice. It finds us and it takes us where it wants us to go. And one of those places is where the ability to forgive resides.

So the challenge is: How can we best practice these two important virtues? The answer is to rise above and look at the large picture, and not take a challenge so personally.

My method is to turn to my intention. Because of what I do, my calling, I’m naturally extremely fine-tuned to others, and to their effect upon me. Intuiting others personally and professionally, I can be challenged through taking things very personally and having my feelings hurt. When this happens, I turn inward, to my own intention. What am I responsible for? I ask. What is my role in this dynamic? What would be the best outcome?

And the answer is forgiveness, which is contributing positively not only to the person you’re forgiving, but to yourself, and, in the larger picture, to the human experience of all of us.

So, now is the time to try your wings. Now is the time to fly free.

Christiana McMahon is a practicing, intuitive clairvoyant and counselor, available for individual readings by phone or in person at 712-412-6254 or christianamcmahon@yahoo.com.