Wendy Elizabeth Flanagan Of Sag Harbor Dies May 18 - 27 East

Wendy Elizabeth Flanagan Of Sag Harbor Dies May 18

icon 1 Photo
Wendy Elizabeth Flanagan

Wendy Elizabeth Flanagan

authorStaff Writer on May 24, 2022

Having proven her salt in NYC after several years in the fashion industry in the early 1990s Wendy returned home to Montauk and the East End of Long Island to pursue a career in education. She began in earnest at Dowling College, earning her master’s degree in elementary education. While this was the professional path that allowed her to return to the East End, there were other reasons (hint: a boy). It turned out that not only was this a practical and rewarding choice of profession but by no means was this anything less than her life’s calling. Returning to the Montauk Public School as an alumnus to teach was a source of great pride for her; her grandmother’s plaque was displayed out front from her years of employment there.

Not only did Wendy acclimate easily to education, but she also excelled at it. Her eye for detail, her quest for perfection, and her endless amount of patience were the ultimate pairings of her love of children and her eagerness to help them become their best selves. Her family never required a calendar to know what time of year it was, the arts & crafts projects for her class that would litter the dining room table explained everything (damn glitter!). Her love knew no bounds, witnessed by each student she taught throughout her 22-year career and starting the pre-K program from scratch, nearly all on her own was Wendy at her peak. A program that is as strong today as it was when it began.

More boundless love. Her weekly league tennis matches that began in singles (there’s a championship or two in there) eventually transitioned into doubles. She adored the friends that she made both within her league and with casual weekly groups that she played in. It was the perfect outlet for her to balance having fun with friends, exercise, and her serious, serious, competitive spirit.

Being her spouse could at times, be exhausting. She NEVER stopped moving. Baking this, cooking that. Wrapping holiday presents that to this day, will go unmatched in their artistry and care. More boundless love. While she could support her partner wanting to steal a nap on a Sunday afternoon, it was reportedly a joyless endeavor. She would inevitably be tackling the one chore that was agreed needed doing at that precise moment. She lived her life up before the sun and asleep on the couch often just before it set; truly remarkable energy. She could often be heard saying, “I love my life!’ And if all of that wasn’t enough, in the last few years Wendy began a coaching career as Pierson High School’s junior varsity volleyball coach. It reignited a passion she held in her own high school days, one that she was able to share with her daughter Grace who is also part of the program. She loved coaching with her JV girls. In a pinch, she was asked to substitute coach the Pierson varsity girls team and we believe she would like it to be known, that her record was 2-0!

Wendy has left behind for her two beautiful children a precise road map for a wonderful life. Skills and lessons that may not yet reveal themselves. She taught them everything they need to know through example. Wendy never talked about it, she just did it, whatever needed doing. Conor and Grace will always know the difference between right and wrong and the correct decisions to make simply from the years of observing their mom, with her boundless love and energy. An irreversible gift.

Wendy’s love of travel was a thing to behold. While there was never enough time or money to do enough of it, if you were on a trip with her, you were seeing EVERYTHING. She didn’t waste a moment and a vacation for her did not include the word relaxation. It was about seizing the opportunity and maximizing the experience. When you left a destination with Wendy, there was nothing more to see, no regrets or a need to return because something was missed. The rest of us needed a vacation after those vacations with her, boundless love doesn’t come cheap.

Her husband, Jay, respected her immensely and everything she did, as would anyone else. Her frustrations were his and her joys were as well. Having a best friend to travel through life with and raise two beautiful children together was their greatest accomplishment that will reflect back on her for as long as they allow it. For them, it may feel like a burden but over time they will learn its worth because their mom always showed them the right thing, and they will prosper and thrive as a result.

She fought like hell. Her friends and family are heartbroken and yet somehow magically, through her boundless love, completely fulfilled.

Wendy passed away after a two-year battle with cancer at Stony Brook Southampton Hospital on May 18th.

She is survived by her father, Barry Kohlus; and her stepmother, Janet Kohlus; her husband, Jay Flanagan, and two children, Conor Jack Flanagan and Grace Elizabeth Flanagan. She is also survived by her brother, Barry Michael Kohlus (Houston, TX) and her nephews Evan, Spencer and Liam Kohlus (Houston, TX). Wendy was predeceased by her mother, Faith Nicoletti.

A Celebration of Wendy’s life will be held on Saturday, June 11, at 3 p.m. at Sylvester Manor, 80 North Ferry Road, Shelter Island. Casual yet respectful attire is requested — and guests should be conscious of their footwear as this will be an outdoor event under a tent. Guests should also plan ahead as there may be a wait to catch a ferry to Shelter Island.

In lieu of flowers, donations can be considered here: https://gofund.me/b4d0801a

You May Also Like:

VIEWPOINT Six Lessons I Learned From Rosalynn Carter

By Linda Bird Francke 1. Rosalynn Carter and I and her Secret Service detail are ... 4 Dec 2023 by Linda Bird Francke

Logical Line

A recent Letter to the Editor by the Very Reverend Abraham A.J. Miller [“Fighting Our Fight,” Letters, November 23] reminds us of past historical commitments and makes the case that Ukraine is fighting our fight against Russia, and U.S. funding of the war should be continued. I would like to expand on that history and demonstrate that Joe Biden’s proxy war could have been avoided had numerous historical grievances and warnings been heeded by the administration. In 1990, U.S. Secretary of State James Baker made verbal commitments on how NATO troops would utilize the territory of former East Germany under ... by Staff Writer

Even Simpler

I have to admit I was flattered that Ken Dorph, the Mideast expert, responded to my Letter to the Editor [“Build Bridges,” Letters, November 30]. He literally spent three paragraphs qualifying that he is an expert, despite the fact that he’s really clearly a antisemite. Ken accuses me of being a racist because my position is that Hamas is a terrorist organization that slaughtered innocent civilians, yet he never addresses the issue. He additionally claims that Benjamin Netanyahu never wanted a two-state solution and conspired to have Hamas as a leading power vs. Yassar Arafat. I’d like to remind our ... by Staff Writer

Remember the Selfless

Many, many thanks are due to the 16-plus personnel who responded to an emergency call on Eastville Avenue late Thanksgiving afternoon. The time frame must certainly have taken place just as they were about to sit down to dinner. The dedication of the men and women who frequently interrupt their own lives to help out others at a stressful time is truly amazing, and we are fortunate to live in such a caring community. Thank God no one was injured and the event itself was relatively minor compared to what could have been. As donation time rolls around, keep in ... by Staff Writer

Newtown

There comes a time within some lives, When sparrows fall and voices fail, And all that is, or ever was, Holds not one single claim to what will be. For twenty-six, and those who cherished them, that day has come. To steal the promise of a morrow they will never see. It was but a school. A place for learning nursery rhymes. A springboard to the finer things. A haven for the callow of our towns. With violent rage meant mostly for the innocent and young, A monster tore from them the joy of youth and life That is the ... by Staff Writer

School News, December 7, Sag Harbor & East Hampton Town

by Staff Writer

One-Woman Reading of ‘A Christmas Carol’ on Saturday as Part of Masonic Music Series

Local actor Laura Jasper will lead a one-woman reading of “A Christmas Carol” by Charles Dickens at the Masonic Temple in Sag Harbor on Sunday, December 10, at 1 p.m. The reading is offered as part of the Masonic Music Series. The tale takes place in London 1843 and features characters Scrooge, Jacob Marley, and ghosts, who in Dickens’s words “may haunt you pleasantly.” Admission is free for the reading, which is appropriate for all ages, but a can of food to be donated to the food pantry is appreciated. The Masonic Temple is located at 200 Main Street, Sag ... by Staff Writer

Frederick ‘Fred’ Kelsey of Sag Harbor Dies November 28

Frederick “Fred” Kelsey of Sag Harbor died on November 28 in Sag Harbor. He was 89. He was born on March 12, 1934 in Paterson, New Jersey, to Ervin and Stella (Canova) Kelsey. His father died at the age of 48, leaving Kelsey to run the family hardware store. He was a graduate of St. Peter’s University, where he was in the ROTC program, becoming a first lieutenant in the U.S. Army Reserve, and earned a master’s degree from Rutgers University. After receiving his master’s degree from Rutgers School of Business, he worked as a financial account representative at the ... by Staff Writer

Logo Contest Launched for Anniversary of American Revolution

Suffolk County Executive Steve Bellone, Nassau County Executive Bruce Blakeman and the Long Island 250 Bi-County Commission announced today the launch of a communitywide logo contest to capture the essence of Long Island’s anniversary of the American Revolution. Local artists of all ages are encouraged to apply through Discover Long Island’s website. The deadline for submissions is December 31, 2023. “The upcoming 250th anniversary of the American Revolution will be a monumental milestone in our nation, but it is even more important that we commemorate Long Island’s significant role in the founding of our nation,” said Bellone. “By engaging Long ... by Staff Writer

Lights Out

Sag Harbor, what happened to our beautiful Parisian street lamps? We now look like an LED Florida subdivision. How sad for our historic village. I hope they saved the frosted panels I saw them removing. Laurie Wiltshire Sag Harbor by Staff Writer