Barbara Irene Tanoff Of East Moriches Dies November 30

Barbara Irene Tanoff of East Moriches died on November 30 at her East Moriches home. She was 70.

A native of Southampton, Mrs. Tanoff, the picture of calm and composure, according to her family, was born during a hurricane on November 25, 1950 at Southampton Hospital to James and Ruth Gilmartin Lynch.

She was the sixth child of nine. Her family owned and operated Lynch’s Garden Center, a business fixture for 80 years in her hometown. She attended Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary School in Southampton and was a 1967 graduate of Mercy High School in Riverhead. That graduation summer at age 17, she went to the beach in Wading River with a friend, her family recalled, and spotted a handsome lifeguard who would later become her husband, Bob.

The Tanoff family had a summer home in Wading River, where they vacationed for many years. Mrs. Tanoff was beautiful and turned Mr. Tanoff’s head that day, her family said, noting that it was love at first sight for the couple.

In the fall, she headed off to Sacred Hearts College in Belmont, North Carolina, and confided to her freshman roommate that she had met the man she was going to marry. Wanting to be nearer to Mr. Tanoff, she transferred to Molloy College in Rockville Centre and they married in 1969.

While raising their two children, Mrs. Tanoff earned a Bachelor of Arts degree from St. Joseph’s college as well as a Master of Arts degree in Education. For 30 years, Mrs. Tanoff was an honored and loved teacher of first, second and third grades at Center Moriches Elementary School.

The centerpiece of Mrs. Tanoff’s life was her family, they said, noting that her husband was her true love, her rock, best friend, and partner in all. Motherhood was a natural fit — she was considered a “baby whisperer” among her family, they noted. She delighted in her own children as well as her many nieces and nephews, whom she regularly welcomed into her home, her family said.

According to her family, Mrs. Tanoff’s daughter and son, Colleen and Chris, were her heart and soul. She relished every aspect of motherhood and was devoted to her children, they said, noting that she walked with them every step of the way, actively supporting and encouraging them as advocate, confidante, and mentor. She was considered a trusted advisor to her children while never giving advice. As a result, both her children, their spouses, and grandchildren loved to spend time with her, her family said.

Mrs. Tanoff had an abiding love of celebrations: births, baptisms, First Communions, graduations, birthdays and weddings, all with great enthusiasm and interest. She made each person feel important, feted, and honored, her family said, noting that she often planned and organized family parties as she was most happy having fun and giving joy to others. Her family could count on her to be there for them, near and far, they said. Mrs. Tanoff and her husband traveled to Virginia Military Institute, University of Saint Andrews in Scotland, Missouri, Florida, and Fort Bragg, North Carolina, to celebrate family milestones.

“Every day is a gift” was a phrase she used often, her family said, noting that she was a gift and will be missed by all those who knew and loved her.

She is survived by her husband, C. Robert Tanoff; her two children, Colleen and Nathan Jayne of Westhampton, and Christopher and Felicia Tanoff of New York City. She is also survived by her grandchildren, Olivia and Ryan Jayne and Christopher and Jake Tanoff; six siblings, Anne Lynch, RSM, Jim and Sharon Lynch, Jerry Lynch, Mary Lynch, Joan Lynch ,Terry and Lori Lynch, Jeanne and Jay Diesing; her sister-in-law Sally Nolan and her husband Terry; as well as many nieces and nephews.

She was predeceased by her parents, Ruth and James Lynch; and her in-laws Christopher and Lila Tanoff; her sister Kathleen Lynch; sister-in-law Patricia Lynch; and brother Tim Lynch.

A Mass of Resurrection took place at St. John the Evangelist in Center Moriches, where she had been a parishioner and volunteer for 42 years.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests that memorials be given to East End Hospice (eeh.org/donate) in her name.