Monument to Gay Rights Pioneer Edith Windsor Unveiled in Southampton

It was a foggy Monday afternoon at Southampton Town Hall, but the message was clear: Love wins.

On June 26, the 10th anniversary of the landmark U.S. Supreme Court decision striking down Section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act, town officials, advocates, local dignitaries and supporters gathered to admire and dedicate a memorial named for Edith Windsor. She was the part-time Southampton resident who brought the legal action challenging the section and emerged victorious in a historic 2013 court ruling.

Envisioned as a platform where civil marriage ceremonies may take place, the Edith Windsor Heart Project is a heart-shaped memorial tribute. Nestled into the grounds at the front corner of Town Hall, the monument comprises a large stone circle with a giant heart inside it with over 250 interlocking hearts within it. Diamond shapes decorate a ring around the circle, reflective of the brooch Windsor wore on her lapel instead of a ring at a time when she couldn’t be legally married or even publicly engaged to Thea Spyer, her partner for over 40 years.

The couple married in Canada in 2007. But, when Spyer died, Windsor learned she was barred from spousal inheritance exemptions under DOMA, which was federal law. She sued the federal government and on June 26, 2013, in a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court ruled in her favor. The ruling was a landmark legal victory for the same-sex marriage movement in the United States.

Not long after Windsor died in 2017, Supervisor Jay Schneiderman recalled, her widow, Judith Kasen-Windsor, reached out in the hope of creating a memorial to her spouse in the town where she summered for most of her life.

Locally, Stony Brook Southampton Hospital named the Edith Windsor Healthcare Center for the activist in 2019, and there are literally dozens of memorial titles, street signs, and scholarships named for her throughout the national and New York City LGBTQ community.

Just this month, on June 20, Governor Kathy Hochul offered remarks at the naming of the Edie Windsor and Thea Spyer Way in the West Village.

“When you meet people who are so tough, and women who are so willing to break down all the barriers, stand up, and just fight like hell — those are the people I love the most, and that’s who Edie was,” the governor said. “And today we benefit and bask in the glory of the freedoms that she made possible for us by standing up so courageously.”

Back in Southampton, three years earlier, Schneiderman and Kasen-Windsor thought about naming a park or street after Windsor, but, instead, wondered, “What if we created a place for people to get married, a platform for ceremonies?”

The heart monument concept was conceived, the supervisor sculpting template hearts in his Southampton Village garage.

Schneiderman created an interlocking heart pattern by developing a mathematical tessellation, an arrangement of shapes in a repeated pattern. “Many hearts comprising one heart is symbolic of the coming together of many people to achieve marriage equality,” he said, describing the vision in 2021.

“I don’t think there’s anything like this in the world,” Mark Olivito of the New Jersey-based firm Paverart said Monday. “It speaks to freedom.”

Paverart crafted the stone hearts, engraving them with the names and messages from those who have purchased them so far. One reads: “It is with the heart one sees clearly.”

Reading the inscriptions before the tribute began, Charles Forthofer and Preston Phillips reported their plans to add a heart to the memorial. They just celebrated 40 years together and were married in 2011.

So, too, were Alan Ceppos and Frederic Rambaud. They were the very first same-sex couple wed by Southampton Town Clerk Sundy Schermeyer that year.

Both she and Suffolk County Legislator Bridget Fleming recalled that era in Southampton. Fleming was a Town Board member and remembered protests by opponents of same-sex marriage every day outside Town Hall — not far from where the Windsor Heart was installed.

On that day, the protesters arrived early in the morning, hoping to confront the first couple. As they waited, the day grew hotter. Eventually, driven away by the 100-degree heat — and “by divine intervention,” Schermeyer related — the same-sex marriage protesters left.

No sooner did they leave than Ceppos and Rambaud arrived with their wedding party.

“We didn’t need to do it as a sign of our love,” Ceppos said of the wedding ceremony. “We did it to make a statement, to stand up and be counted.”

The couple, who had been together for decades, had no role models growing up, he pointed out.

“For us,” he said, “the thought of maybe some 10-year-old kid who lived in Southampton could say, ‘Wow! People can get married here and can be accepted.’ That was why we did it.”

Couples who came in that year had been together 40 and 50 years, Schermeyer recalled, they’d made longtime commitments. “I’m very proud to be part of this,” she said.

“It’s been a long journey, “ Fleming said, thanking Schermeyer for “carrying the torch” despite threats and incessant haranguing from opponents.

With a beaming smile of her own, Schermeyer recalled Windsor as a petite powerhouse, “a force to be reckoned with.”

“I don’t know of anybody who wasn’t affected by that decision,” Councilwoman Cyndi McNamara said. “It’s something we can’t take for granted and something we have to remind ourselves — it wasn’t always a right … Love is love, and we go forward and we have to remember the people who got us there. There are people who fought to get us where we are.”

“I hope Edie’s looking down, and I hope she hears my thank you,” Councilman Rick Martel said. He told the story of his sister and her partner, together for decades before they could get married.

Windsor was “all about love, all about inclusion,” longtime friend Ardon Kessler said. She offered a statement on behalf of Kasen-Windsor, who had been expected to attend the tribute. She was called to Manhattan at the last minute, asked to join Vice President Kamala Harris in Pride celebrations in the city.

A lot of love went into the assemblage of the monument, McNamara said, speaking of watching Schneiderman overseeing the painstaking installation of the hearts. They arrived in many pieces, with exhaustive directions, he acknowledged, adding, “I’m happy to report, there were no broken hearts.”

The monument isn’t completely finished — grass was seeding on Monday afternoon and there are plans to install plantings and benches for wedding attendees. More hearts are available for purchase and inscription through the town website. All money raised will contribute to construction and maintenance of the memorial, with additional funds supporting the Edith Windsor Health Clinic at Stony Brook Southampton Hospital.

“Thanks to Edie Windsor, you can marry who you love right here,” Schneiderman said.

“When we see this heart, when we have a victory, it’s sweet,” State Assemblyman Fred W. Thiele Jr. said. But no victories are permanent, he reminded. The Supreme Court has changed, rights are being retracted, and “We need to be vigilant,” the lawmaker asserted.

Speaking of Windsor, he said it was an honor and privilege to know her and to know “Edie was ours in the Town of Southampton. She didn’t just change the law, she changed people’s minds, and she changed people’s hearts.”